Jump to content
WildSurvive Forum
Sign in to follow this  
Machine

Funny Stories

Recommended Posts

Do you have funny fishing stories to share?  Put them here.

 

Last year, I was family camping with some family and friends family.  The campground we stay at has a small catch and release trout pond.  We have been camping here and knowpretty well how to catch these fish so it is kind of boring, except the fact that there are some big ones. Well my son and me friend had small RC boats that we all had been playing with.  I joking around said I wonder if we could tie line on and troll with the RC boat for fish.  Well, my friend actually tried it.  He ended up catching a trout on the RC boat.  IT WAS FUNNY!!!!  I have it on video.  The problem was the fish was stronger than the boat so he couldn't get it in.  He had to paddle the canoe out to get it.  The fish was released and we laughed all day.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have a funny personal story that at the time was not so funny. But now it is extremely funny... so here it goes.... I was out catfishing a few years back with a couple of buddies of mine

and we were getting ready to go home and i went to shake the chicken liver off of my hook well when i went to smack it against the top of the water i didnt have enough slack out to actually hit the water. Well the weight and the hook went towards the water and then snapped back at me well i didnt have a shirt on...(here is the not so funny part, mostly cause it hurt my pride.) and the weight the leader and the hook came back and smacked me in the chest and if that one ounce weight didnt hurt the hook that inserted itself into my nipple did.  Well to say the least this is when the laughing started.  And to tell you the truth the laughing never really has.  :blush:  Well needless to say i stood there in shock and just stared at the hook. It took me a few moments to figure out that i should probably get it out, i had thought about leaving it in but had decided that was not the most sanitary way to deal with this, so i squeezed the barb back down and i slowly miticulously slid the hook back out. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Here goes a double Unca Classic:

 

Frog-gigging, as y'all know, is done in pitch black night. 

 

We were gonna go Cadillac-style:  using a boat and an automobile headlamp with a car battery.

 

Trip Number ONE:

 

There we were, gliding 'way back under the cottonwood trees in the bayous... spooky.  We turned on the light to spot the reflections of the bullfrog's eyes.  I caught a motion overhead.

 

I says to Lee (my crazy buddy who owned the aluminum jonboat):  "Lee... shine the light overhead."

 

He does so. 

 

YIKES!! THERE ARE ABOUT SIX COTTOMOUTH MOCCASINS HANGING ON THE LOW TREE LIMB!!

 

"YAAAAAAH!!!!!! Lee shouts, just as one of these big sausage-lookin' poisonous monsters drops offa the tree limb and into the small boat!  :woot: 8| :scared:

 

Lee picks up his shotgun, and without a thought... blows the snake away. 

 

He also blew a HUGE hole in the bottom of the boat.  All around us, we can hear the snakes dropping down into the water (thank God no more dropped in the rapidly sinking boat!)

 

I tore (literally TORE) my shirt off, and stuffed it in the big hole in the bottom of the boat.  Bailing and paddling, we quickly headed back to camp... we were simply too spooked to continue frog-gigging.

 

OK... Spent the whole next  day patching and pop-riveting.  The jonboat was nearly good as new by the time nightfall came around, just in time for:

 

Trip Number TWO:

 

Darkness.  We began paddling just like the night before.  Even though neither of us would admit it to the other, we were ALREADY spooked, thinking of alla those big, fat poisonous snakes we had seen overhead...

 

Back in the bayous...  :dribble: :sad:

 

We turn the light on, and ahead about twenty feet there is a really nice, big bullfrog all lit up.  We start easing forward toward the shore (with the cottonwoods OVERHEAD).

 

All of a sudden, there is a tremendous THUMP! on the floor of the boat!  A loud smacking racket!

 

Lee and Your Humble Obdn't &tc both instantly dove overboard to get the hell outa Dodge!

 

When we got the courage up to swim back and peek in the boat... we saw that a large BASS had jumped into it!!

 

;)

 

Again, we were too spooked to continue, but at least there was no new hole blown in the bottom, and we had bass for dinner!

 

:) :) :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Man Unca, I would have loved to see the looks on people's faces there when that guy blew the hole in the bottom of the boat. I am cracking up now......seeing it would have been AWESOME!  That is FUNNY!!!!! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah seeing must be 10x more funny :)

 

This story is more ironic than funny, but it has its fair share of funnyness.

My family together with another related family went hiking on the mountain. Out water supplies kept shrinking because it was a torid day. We ran across a water source but it had tiny (not yet developed - don`t know how they're called) frogs. Everybody agreed that we should find another water source and went on our way. Well the thirst became really tough to handle in a very short while. After many MANY - that seemed like an eternity hours we came back the same way, and when founding the same water source we did not care about any bugs or frogs...we drank that water and we were happy :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Here's another fishing funny:

 

When I was a kid, my Daddy and I went on a trip up to the Bay of Fundy.  That is the Atlantic side border of the US and Canada.  The Bay of Fundy is famous for having the highest tides in the world, due to the funnel shape of the land.

 

We were out on what is known as the Ledges of Maces Bay.  This is a large, sandy area.  Since the sand is not totally level, when the tide goes out, there are pools of water left.  You can catch flounders by hand in these pools -- GREAT FUN!!

 

Daddy and I kept on going from one pool to another, dragging a washtub.  We had the washtub about half full of flounders, and we were about a half-mile from "shore" on the sand...

 

Suddenly, here came the tide!!

 

When the tide comes in, it comes in in a "boil".  That is to say, it comes in not just creeping like we are all used to, but in a huge WAVE.

 

YIKES!

 

In an instant we were up to our waists in rushing seawater, ONE HALF MILE FROM SHORE... with the water rising even higher!

 

We dropped that dang washtub, and began wading/running (as well as you can "run" in waist-deep water!) toward shore.

 

We had to SWIM the last quarter-mile. 

 

The score was:  Daddy and Walt = 0, Flounders = ALL SCOT FREE :) :)  ;):P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This one is a funny HUNTING story...

 

A buddy of mine (who was a much better shot with a shotgun) and Your Humble Obdn't &tc were dove hunting in Texas near Abilene.

 

The way you hunt dove there (it is semidesert) is to sit by a "tank" (pond) and wait for dove to fly in.  When they do, you do your best to knock them outa the air.  Very difficult, as dove are tweeny, and they fly quite fast and erratically.

 

Nevertheless, we were doing pretty good... and wonder of wonders, I was keeping up with my buddy!  So he decided to up the ante...

 

"Yo, Walt... I bet you a dollar that the next one I shoot, I can make fall in that field over there."  This was a reasonable thing to say, since the dove were flying in to the pond in such a way that when hit, there was a high probability of them falling in that field.

 

But, feeling in a silly mood due to my unusual success so far, I answered:

 

"OK, you go for the field.  I am going to be far more precise... my next bird will fall..."

 

Just then, a dove came in from an odd angle.  I quickly brought up my shotgun and let fly.  The dove fell down out of the sky, and hit my buddy in the back.

 

"Rats ass!" I cussed, "I was aiming for him to hit you in the head!"

 

My buddy reached in his pocket, and pulled out a dollar and handed it to me. :) :)  :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :rofl: :rofl:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ah... a funny (sorta) fishing story:

 

Again, back when I wuz a kid (this was back in The Olden Days), my Daddy taught me how to tickle trout.

 

This is a method of catching fish without using ANYTHING but your hands.  Hmmm... occurs to me this is a good survival trick!

 

The way you do it is to find an overhanging rock in a stream.  Trout, fer youse what don't trout fish much, like to hang out UNDER rocks in swift water.  OK... you have found your rock.

 

Eeeeeaaase your hand in the water at the downstream end of the rock (while staying out of sight of the fish under the rock...)  move your hand very slowly forward, with your thumb and forefinger forming an inverted "U" shape.

 

You will feel the trout's tail.  Seven of ten times, the trout will dart away.  Start over a coupla minutes later if this happens. 

 

BUT!! Those three times he doesn't dart away... now you begin to "tickle" him:

 

You ever-so-gently and slowly use your thumb and forefinger to caress the sides of the fish... all the while moving your hand forward toward the front of the fish.  When you get at the fins near the gills, you grab! the trout and pull him out of the water!

 

OK... that is the technique taught to me by my Daddy.  Now... there I was, a kid in raggedy shorts and no shoes.  Showed up at the edge of a stream where this guy with about four hunnert dollars worth of waders, creel, lures, fancy rod, yadayada was casting out repetitively.

 

And UNsuccessfully.

 

I saw a perfect overhang rock.  Settled down, and began the maneuver.  As luck would have it, there was a really nice, big trout under it.  And the procedure WORKED!

 

I pulled up the fish in my bare hand, and the guy with the fancy equipment damn' near fainted as I walked off back home with supper!!!    :thumbsup: :thumbsup: !!! :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :P :P

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×