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"Dear Survivorguy,

 

  I bought a new tent, but my wife doesn't want me buying more gear.  How do I sneak it past her?"

 

Answer>

 

Hey honey look what I bought. It was on sale (everythings for sale) We can use it when we go on vacation to see your mother. ;)

 

If your looking for answers to those hard to solve Questions this is where you can get answers. They may or may not be the right answers but they will get answered here.

 

SURVIVOR GUY

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Question from Kentucky Bob>

 

"Dear Survivorguy,

 

My wife is making plans for us to attend her 3rd cousin's wedding.  How can I get out of it without her getting really mad at me?"

 

Just say> "Boy your second cousin is HOT. I cant wait to kiss her after the marriage ceremony.Ill bet shes gonna have some HOT chicks stand up with her also I cant wait  :bounce: :bounce:

 

:P

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Guest taken by the wind...

~ whoa....  8|  Survivor Guy rules.....  :pray: (survivor guy)

 

hey...  :unsure:  I didn't see Kentucky Bob ask that question...

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~ whoa....  8|  Survivor Guy rules.....  :pray: (survivor guy)

 

hey...  :unsure:  I didn't see Kentucky Bob ask that question...

Its in survival guy fan club Taken.

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Guest Lead Dog

Dear Survivorguy,

 

There is this woman in my life, let's call her Mrs. Lead Dog.  I really want another dog or two and she keeps telling me no more.  What should I do?

 

Thanks in advance!

 

Canineless in Chicago

 

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Oh boy Lead Dog your dancin in a mine field here. Your messin with the supreme being. You better do as she says or her lawyer will make you wish you had. :o

 

You could however trade her for a dog. In some cases thats not a bad trade.  :yes: If you can train the dog to do house work it could work out. :unsure:

 

Theres one more option I hesatate to suggest. Check out animal sex .com  :P

 

I think you should consider a quad instead. They dont bark, smell, shed, die, get sick, or convert dog food into dog poop. :thumbup:

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Dear SURVIVORGUY,

 

    I've been spending several hours late at night signalling for UFO's to land an visit me.  I've tried lasers. pulsed light, signs, and even high frequency audio signals with no results.  What am I doing wrong?

 

Your friend,

Nutty Squirrel

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What am I doing wrong?

 

Nutty Squirrel your trying to signal UFOs. :nono: I must warn you as to what happened to others when they came in contact with UFOs :o

Unless you ENJOY having a probe up your ass I sugest you quit it. :nop:

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Dear SURVIVORGUY,

 

    Why are women so complicated?  How can we simple men understand them??

 

First off girls are all good some are just better than others. Remember if you stand them on their heads they all look alike. :naughty:

 

You cant live with them and you cant live with out them. If you want to be happy for the rest of your life never make a pretty woman your wife. :blushing:

 

Also remember girls can dish it out but they cant take it. Just try to ignore them believe me your better off in the long run. :thumbup:

 

A girl told me once "women arent putting up with the crap men are doing anymore. There going out and looking for other men"

Well DUH Im that OTHER man. The last I knew it takes two doesnt it? So how could one species get ahead of the other? :woot:

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Dear Survivor Guy,

 

     My arch nemisis, The Armadillo, has discovered my vulnerability to P***** B*****.  He has covered himself and his henchmen in it.  How do I get him to remove it without getting any on myself and losing my super squirrel powers?

 

Your #1 fan,

Super Squirrel :squirrel:

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Guest taken by the wind...

~ Super Squirrel... I had no idea that you were vulnerable to OOPs....  I won't tell. (don't wanna give it away.)  :whistle:

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Dear Survivor Guy,

 

     My arch nemisis, The Armadillo, has discovered my vulnerability to P***** B*****.  He has covered himself and his henchmen in it.  How do I get him to remove it without getting any on myself and losing my super squirrel powers?

 

Your #1 fan,

Super Squirrel :squirrel:

 

Dave?  Just so I won't accidently sap your super squirrel powers, is P. B. "Pookie Bear"?

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Guest taken by the wind...

~   8|

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Dear Survivor Guy,

 

    My arch nemisis, The Armadillo, has discovered my vulnerability to P***** B*****.  He has covered himself and his henchmen in it.  How do I get him to remove it without getting any on myself and losing my super squirrel powers?

 

Your #1 fan,

Super Squirrel

Well hell stay away from the armadillo. You must not have much powers if you cant outrun an armadillo. :dontgetit:

 

Ive got that stuff on me lots of times especially on my face all you got to do is wash it off BEFORE you go home. :o :yes: :P

 

 

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Guest taken by the wind...

~   8|  Survivor Guy... am I to believe my own ears that you are NOT aware of the tactical maneurvers associated with the arch nemisis Armadillo assassin?  :scared:

 

shall I be forced to assume that you are oblivious to the Pit Bull natured tendencies of this criminal in armour that plods along inconspicuously, yet relentlessly in pursuit of the one Super Squirrel?  :scared:

 

forever hunting him down in his own hunting grounds? Disguising himself as a rock among many acorns beneath the trees....   :ninja:   

 

Is THAT what I am to think???   :scared: :scared: :'(

 

woe unto us all... if p*****  b***** becomes our downfall.........

 

:P :whistle: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

 

Whew! THAT Was close. I almost gave up the Kryptonite of Super Squirreldom!  :scared:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Guest taken by the wind...

  Ooops... you're right. I better go erase it! LOL!  :whistle:

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Guest taken by the wind...

Now you must swear under oath never to TELL what the Kryptonite of Super Squirreldom is.....    :smoke:

 

Or I will have to kill you.  :ninja:

 

 

 

 

:P

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